I have a dilemma in life.
How does one find a middle ground between worrying too much and not worrying at all?
I know people in both categories. Technically, I am in the first category--I worry every little thing until it can not possibly be worried about anymore. But then I also know people who are either essentially care free OR are essentially in denial.
In reality, I feel sorry for people in the latter category. Maybe not people who are carefree; if you can live your life without any worry, then more power to you. However, I knew a girl in high school who didn't worry about things because, if it wasn't to her liking, she simply IGNORED it. That, of course, caused for bigger problems when the thing she should have been worrying about, and possibly attempting to avoid, actually happened.
So, my dilemma.
Do I keep worrying about every. little. thing, OR, do I take the advice of my family, friends and therapist, and try to live more in the moment and not worry at all?
Or do I find a middle ground? And if I make that decision, how do I do so?
Chris and I hung out last night and in my opinion, it went TOO well. I mean, it was lovely and I do appreciate it for what it was; a lovely time spent together in the short time we have left before I leave for Chicago for the summer. But I find myself even analyzing the good! When he does what I WANT him to do, I worry!
Last night, I called him twice and was at first dismayed that he did not answer. However, he soon called me back. And not only did he call me back, but he suggested we hang out...that night. And we did. And it was pretty amazing. We watched Elf, and cuddled, and had pretty good sex, for missionary position. And it was just sweet and we had a lot of fun, even though we basically just spent the night together.
So why, now, am I worrying about it being TOO good?
Bwah. I've got issues, doods.
But for right now, until I hear/know anything, I am just going to enjoy it. Because it was pretty amazing.
Other than that, things have been pretty blah. My sophomore year is coming to an end. School is going relatively well; geography sucks, but I am acing my journalism and African-American studies classes. Yay. And, in less than three weeks, I will be living in Chicago for the entire summer, working at a national magazine that focuses on alternative art/film/music for/by women. :)
I think I am going to lock my diary because of that; I will probably be mentioning well-known names that would come up via search engine, so if you would like to keep updated, please tell me and I will give you a password!