I feel like I am truly evolving as a person.
Something like what I wrote about in my last entry would have normally bothered me quite a bit. Like, REALLY bothered me. For some reason, it really drives me nuts when my past comes into contact with my present, in any way, shape, or form. And the fact that I girl a knew in high school , the years which I consider to be my worst, "almost dated" the same guy I've been sleeping with off/on for seven month would have pushed me over the edge.
However, it does not bother me now. Well, that is a lie; it bothers me a bit, especially when I think of the things Nolan said and did to me...I can't help but to think of him saying and doing the same things to her. But, rather than be unreasonably upset, I realize that I should be ANGRY. I completely idolized a boy who is no better than any of the others I have been with.
I hate to say that all men are scum, but in my case, they really are. But I am learning from that. Rather than let myself fall apart, I am realizing that I am much better off.
Though, in another case of irony, I found out today that I am interning this summer with one of Kelly's best friends. How small of a crazy world is the one in which we live? It is completely nutso, but I can deal with it. Like I said, I am not going to lose my mind over that which not only can I not control, but should really have no affect on my happiness anyway.
See how mature I am? I am surprising even myself.
I've been talking to Jason lately. Last night and into this morning we sent each other naughty texts...it was fun, especially now that I am completely detached from him emotionally. It feels nice to finally be doing things purely for my amusement.
AND, I have a new crush. He is 28 and DIVORCED...how nuts is that? I actually met Ryan through him. We friended each other on MySpace and have been sending messages back and forth over spring break. Yesterday I posted a bulletin that I had a new screenname, and he IM'ed me! At least I think he did... I briefly left my computer and when I got back I had an IM that said, "Hey there Kat, its Chris, bored at the Donkey (a coffee shop in town)". But before I could respond, he signed off. Kind of weird, but whatevs.
My insomnia has been driving me nutso lately. I just want to sleeeep, but I can't. So I stay up all night watching TV on my computer. I'm pretty sure I've watched the entire only season of My So-Called Life. Good show.
I'm sure there is more to write about, but I simply can not think of it right now. More later, for sure.